Thursday, November 20, 2003

Love in the library

Oh the things that I see when I'm at this library of mine. This had to have been one of the most vulgar displays of machismo I've ever seen.

At the circ desk, when I was working in rough sort, this guy walks up to the counter. Kind of a Mac Daddy with no social skills walks up to this pretty tall asian woman. Here, I will narrate the conversation

Pimp Daddy: Heeey Lady. Checkin' out some books.
Kind Reserved Asian lady: Yes, that is why I am at the check out counter.
PD: So, Korean or Chinese?
KRAL: Excuse me? I am not going to answer that.
PD: I like to know what kind of lady I'm talkin' to
KRAL: I don't tell people that kind of thing
PD: Don't get me wrong, I just don't want to insult you by calling you Korean, ya know, if you're not
KRAL: :Yeah. Well have a nice day
PD: Oh yeah, you know I will now

IWWWWWWWWW! What on G-d's green earth was this guy thinking? He was going to mac on this lady right there, and she was going to swoon over this guy, and hand out her number like Halloween candy? To make this even worse, he was standing AT the circ desk, having his discourse infront of "hip retro-librarian in training", who had to listen to it all. Then he says to HRLIT "I dunno why she just didn't tell me, I like to know who my ladies are" his reasoning was going to make all parties involved say "Oh, well, in that case, Kind Reserved Asian lady was a total jerk to you". Whatever, this guy is an icky freak.

But the hot love doesn't end there. Remember man who wanted to create his profile at Well he came back. This time he had gone to Kinko's and scanned his picture. Now he wanted to know how to "put it in his profile". Only you can't download stuff off a disk onto the computer. So we had to tell him to go back to Kinko's and email it to himself, and then just insert the picture from his email.

You know what he said? "what is email?". How does this guy think he is going to even use his online profile if he doesn't know what email is? Good heavens. Maybe he plans on listing a PO box for women to write to. Who knows.

Its bad enough that the librarians and staff at our branch are so gorgeous that we have to fend advances off with a special stick we keep under the reference desk, but now our poor patrons also have to brave this climate of "hot seductive patron candor"? Maybe we need to have a can of pepper spray that hot patrons can check out of reserve when this sort of thing happens. What else are we supposed to do? We certainly can't have a "No hot people allowed" sign on the door, because then none of the staff could come to work, and if we did, it would be a double standard.

Needless to say, I've learned that not only corporate librarians are hot. Public librarians can be too. It's a very valuable life lesson. I hope you've all learned something.

No comments: